Royal Hungup.
Happy post! I mean, for the past few post with Ashbaby, it's all smiles and sweet nothings huh? I guess it's about time it all changed. Encountering bumps in the relationship as soon as we hit the first month.
I hate bumps.By theory, no one would care if I blogged and whined.
But I'm too darn tired of rules now. I'm waiting for her call.. cos I admit, I screwed up bad last night, pissed her off and... yea, reaping the harvest of my transgression. Immatured mindset, seriously, I have enough of myself. I think life has been a great joke to me thus far.. I've never really worked hard for anything and as each of my dreams get snuffed out, I just watch as new hopes whizz pass me. I'm not an achiever. Unlike her.. I've not been exposed to the grown up world.. and thus... we think differently.
Which is good?Sometimes.But I hold her back. I'm like an anchor that disapproves of her voyage into the great unknown. Funny how I realise it, but make no progress in letting go. In the process, I invoke negative thoughts and that leads to uttering the wrong words. Why can I admit my flaws.. yet do nothing to change them? Is it because I'm human; weak and useless by my own strength? I need divine intervention to enlighten me? God? Perhaps backslidding so long has made me... invisible on His radar.. Has He forsaken me to struggle on my own, so that I realise failure is all that awaits when I walk this life alone? Relationships are pure extremes. Either pure euphoria or pure agony.
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